customers confusing polite, friendly, small talk with flirting haha
glue a large rock to each of my hands and throw my ass off a bridge
i can wait until summer is over and the creepy guys stop coming into my store
i love how i’m 5’9” and 200 lbs, but i can still move quietly enough to unintentionally frighten 50% of my co-workers
Also she sleeps here all goddamned day and I refuse to clean when she’s around because it’s so frustrating not only cleaning around someone but trying to be quiet while doing that.
I need to keep telling myself that I love my older sister just so that I can stop from screaming every time I come home to see her car parked in the drive way.
if zodiac signs were memes
aquarius: socially awkward penguin
pisces: shrek is love shrek is life
aries: ……………slime man
gemini: anime tiddies
leo: that really annoying one about coming out and being attacked
virgo: tfw no gf
libra: powerpoint done in comic sans
scorpio: rage comic
sagittarius: 12 year old furries
capricorn: the first meme of 2014
Midousuji comparing himself to Unit 02 and him in Asuka’s entry plug suit and her ICONIC LINE AT THE END OF EoE!!!
Make either Onoda or Imaizumi into Shinji and it’s perfect.
I’ve got 99 Midousuji headcanons and they’re equally divided between hilarious and heartbreaking